Dear Expectant Mom,
We understand that this is an emotional, difficult time in
your life. We want to be there for you if you need extra support in the coming
months. You are an important person to your baby and to us.
We (Adugna and Heidi) were friends for eight years before
getting married three years ago. We have had a long journey in dreaming of
growing our family - one that would not have been made without a great deal of
love for each other. With us, your baby will be the little brother or sister, grandchild,
nephew or niece, and cousin to many. Your baby is going to be spoiled. Oh yes… we
admit it.
I (Adugna) have wanted to be called Daddy for years. I’m the
favored uncle amongst my nephews and nieces. I look forward to raising your
baby to appreciate my Ethiopian culture and speak Amharic as a second
language. We will play with your baby on the floor as they learn to crawl
and listen to the adorable baby giggles. I hope to teach your child to play
guitar - something I enjoy doing. We will travel to Ethiopia to visit my family
and to Germany to visit my family that lives there, too. Ethiopian families are
very close and supportive of each other. We know how much they will love your
baby. In my home country, people naturally include everyone in the family. In
our home now, we value the same ideals about family and community that I
learned in Ethiopia. The word for family in my native language, Amharic, is
beteseb ቤተሰብ.
The first part of that word, bete, is the word for house. Family is home.
As a mom of three children- two biological sons and a
daughter adopted from China- I (Heidi) help my children to embrace their gifts
and talents and to rise above any “labels” the world might place on them. I
understand that children who are adopted require guidance to weave together
their own unique life stories, and have learned how to graciously respond to
the many questions about why my daughter does not look like me. I like buying
new cookbooks and trying new recipes so our family can gather for dinner, and
your baby will be there at the table with us. As a family, we love camping in
the mountains with no internet and fresh air. We will teach your baby to make s’mores
and to appreciate blooming flowers and big trees. We genuinely value family
time. My sons attend university, and my daughter attends the local high school.
They are already planning fun times with their new little brother or sister
like taking your baby for ice cream and playdates in the park. I also have
a supportive and loving extended family here in California.
With grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins around the
world, your baby will be hugged, kissed, and lovingly treasured
internationally. We are an unusual family that looks more like the United
Nations than relatives, but we love that about us.
We look forward to having an open, ongoing relationship with
you. China only has closed adoptions so we have no contact with my daughter’s
birth family. Sadly, this has left gaps in the knowledge of her own beginnings.
We understand how valuable an open adoption can be, not only for the child but
for everyone involved. We are accepting of whatever plan you would like to have
to keep in contact, whether that be visits and/or letters and text messages. We
are thankful to have the opportunity for open adoption.
Gwadenya ጓደኛ means ‘my friend’ in Amharic. It speaks to that deep connection between people who share moments together that are life-changing. We looking forward to getting to know you and your baby, and we know that you will be our Gwadenya ጓደኛ.
Sincerely,
Adugna and Heidi