Dear Expectant Mother,
Life takes us down the most unexpected paths sometimes. For example, I (Christina) never thought my husband, Ryan, and I would end up building a life for ourselves in the same, suburban area I grew up in and never thought we would be childless and on the path to adopt. Throughout our lifetimes, we’ve learned that while making plans is wise, plans inevitably change, and that’s okay. We understand how your pregnancy may have caused some plans to change in your life, too.
We were married in October 2015, and we always talked about having children. After about a year and a half of marriage, we started trying to conceive, and we’ve been unsuccessful. Over the years, we’ve had three miscarriages, and we’ve been told our fertility issues are “unexplained.” After years of heartbreak, disappointment, and grief over the loss of our babies that we hoped for and loved, but never met, we finally came to the conclusion that our plan needed to change and that is when we started to explore adoption.
While our journey to private adoption has been difficult, we understand that this isn’t an easy journey for you either. Christina’s dad, Frank, passed away almost four years ago, and when she asked him for some last-minute advice during one of his final days, he told her that we just have to roll with it, and it’ll all work out because it always does. We know our journey to parenthood will work out, and we’re confident your journey will work out as well.
When we consider being given the gift of someone calling us mom and dad, we’re positively overwhelmed. Knowing that you, the person reading this, could be giving that gift to us fills us with so much joy. We will provide your baby with a life of joy, stability, privilege, happiness, structure, and love. Your baby will not only have us to raise them, but also Christina’s mother, Carole, who lives with us. She is already a wonderful grandmother to our nephew, Riker, who is only a few months old.
The type of relationship you would like to have with us might be unclear to you at this time, and that’s understandable. What we know is that honesty and openness are important to us and to how we plan to raise your baby. We are open to your child knowing you. We will share their story with them, and when we speak of you, it will always be with honor, grace, and gratefulness.
We hope that by getting to know us, you take us into consideration as prospective parents to your child. Even if you do not choose us, we wish you an easy pregnancy, delivery, and transition into your role as a mother. Thank you for taking the time to consider us, and if you do choose us, thank you for giving us the gift of parenthood.
Christina and Ryan