Dear Expectant Mother,
We don’t take your choice lightly. We can imagine an ache you might feel in considering letting your child go. We’ve had that same ache and carry it with us still. Our son, Leo, died on May 3rd, 2019. He was a micro-preemie born at 22 weeks and lived for thirteen days before dying peacefully in our arms. We know the ache of letting a child go. We honor your choice to share your baby with strangers and we know it is a choice that will shape the rest of your life, as it will shape us for the rest of our lives. We’ve been told that to let your child go is the greatest act of motherhood and love, and now that we have lived a form of this, we completely agree. You are brave and we are grateful.
Leo’s life planted a seed in us, a desire to continue growing our family and give the love we know we can. Leo taught me, Mara, that being a mom is a natural and humbling role I am meant to play in this life. Adoption is something we have talked a lot about, for longer than before we got pregnant with Leo. While then it was just an idea, now it is a choice that feels right for our family. We were blessed with another biological child, our daughter Beau, in fall 2020, and though we want to continue to add to our family, we don’t feel that another high-risk pregnancy is right for us. We have been together for about twelve years now and our partnership is solid and steady. Life’s growing pains have brought us closer instead of pulling us apart, and we are humbled to be able to model this type of partnership to our children.
In our house your child will be well-loved and valued as an individual. We strive to appreciate who a person is and respect that about other people as well. We are prepared to support your child as they join our family, and answer questions they have about their birth story. We will celebrate their story. We are excited to introduce your child to their big sister, Beau. She is the silliest baby we could have imagined, and we believe she was sent to us to teach us the importance of joy. We promise to bring that joy to your child.
We live in a vibrant college town with our dog, Olive. We love to garden and cook, go on walks and jogs whenever we can, and enjoy the Great British Baking show more than we should probably admit. Travel excites us and we are beginning to take Beau places like Chicago and Florida to meet her extended family. Rest is just as important as play to us, Sundays are our sacred time to spend the day as a family, relax, and enjoy a delicious meal without making any other plans for the day. We have a strong network of friends and family who are all instrumental in supporting us as parents. Additionally, Beau goes to a daycare where she is treated like one of the staff’s own children. When they say it takes a village to raise a child, they mean it and we are incredibly grateful for our village.
We are humbled and honored that you are considering us to raise your child. Thank you for this wonderful gift. We will celebrate your child’s birth story and share with them how brave and strong their birth mom is.
Mara and Blake (and Beau and Olive)